BREAKING: Human Milk Good For Humans
I’m not a mother—nursing or otherwise—but I’m aware that breast milk is uniquely high in nutrition for kids, and it leads to better short-term and long-term health. So please don’t discourage women from doing it.
If it makes you uncomfortable to see a woman nursing her child, please just look at something else instead. Don’t make a face. Don’t talk about her. Don’t ask her to go to the bathroom (WTF). Because seriously. It’s natural to nurse, but that doesn’t mean it’s always easy to do. And not everybody who decides to give her baby the benefits of breastfeeding has the personality necessary for standing up to haters.
Most states have laws protecting public breastfeeding because nursing is recognized as a good thing, but not everybody knows that. So I support Pittsburgh artist Jill Miller’s project, The Milk Truck.
If a woman gets harassed for breastfeeding, she can alert The Milk Truck and lots of other nursing moms in her area, and soon a step van with a giant breast on top will arrive on the scene to set up a friendly gathering of mothers who are all breastfeeding their kids.
The Milk Truck only creates a spectacle if a woman is accused of creating a spectacle herself; the many shops and restaurants that are already kind to nursing mothers will never get a Milk Truck visit (without issuing an invitation!). And all business owners benefit from The Milk Truck project by getting some gentle prodding to work proactively with their staff on making sure their space is welcoming to women who breastfeed.
Also it’s silly. Just like nursing hang-ups.
The Milk Truck is set for exhibition as part of Pittsburgh’s Biennial, and it will be on display at the Andy Warhol Museum from September through December, 2011. You’re welcome to show your support.
Are You Sure? by Stephen Colbert, as read by Jack McCoy
Did you hear that? No? You’re prob’ly going deaf.
It’s your kids back home, cooking up some crystal meth.
Did you turn off the oven? Did you set the alarm?
They still haven’t caught The Man With One Arm.
Look around at these people. How safe do you feel?
[I think maybe he skipped a line here accidentally?]
Your car—when you parked, did you remember to lock it?
Thinking reasonably, odds are, no one hears a pickpocket.
That guy who just coughed down your neck—could he have an infection?
The restaurant where you went to brunch—did it fail its health inspection?
A madman could set loose a virus for which there isn’t a cure;
And while these things may be unlikely, ask yourself: Are You Sure?
And can you be sure that…
You won’t get ebola from a tainted diet cola,
Toxic waste, or get chased by a bearded ayatollah?
Funnel clouds, inhale! Anthrax in the mail!
Your lover will discover your vestigial tail!
Someone’s robbing your house. I can see through your blouse.
Your mother was right; you chose the wrong spouse.
Unlabeled Dranos; tornados; torpedoes;
The horrible sight of some guidos in Speedos!
STDs; PCBs; SUVs; UV light;
A giant pimple on your face—you have a date tonight!
Choking on biscotti; being whacked by John Gotti;
Getting trapped overnight in a full porta-potty!
And I have a final fear to drop in the bucket,
‘bout a friend of a friend of The Man From Nantucket.
There once was a man from Eau Claire,
Whom no one was able to scare.
He wouldn’t join in the panics
About the Hispanics,
And later he was killed by a bear.
Alan Arkin?
I thought you were talking about Ellen Barkin!
